FEEL FREE TO COMMENT ON ADDITIONAL OBSERVATIONS BEYOND WHAT IS INDICATED BELOW!!! COMMENT ON THE DRAFT ITSELF OR A SEPARATE SHEET.
Round 1
1. Comment on the intro. Does it hook the reader's attention with a personal anecdote or commentary on the sociology content? Does it articulate the essay's perspective? What could the reader do to improve it?
2. For each body paragraph, underline the topic sentence. Then, check to see that everything in that paragraph relates to the topic sentence. Let the writer know if a detail doesn't belong by indicating so on the draft.
3. For each body paragraph, comment on the use of evidence and personal examples. Mark places in the essay that could use more evidence/examples. Is the writer showing or merely telling? Give them feedback about where they need to "show" their points more.
4. On the bottom or back of the draft (or on a separate sheet of paper), answer the following...
- What do you like about the draft?
- What could the writer do to improve the draft?
- Answer the writer's question.
Round 2
1. As you read the essay, feel free to comment on some of the same elements from Round 1.
2. For each body paragraph, comment on the essay's development. Mark places on the draft that are underdeveloped (need more evidence and/or analysis) or could benefit from more personal narrative/anecdote.
3. Evaluate the use of sociology content. Mark places on the draft that could use more sociology content. Indicate places where the writer might benefit from including a quote from one of the readings. Indicate places that the sociology content could be beefed up.
4. On the bottom or back of the draft (or on a separate sheet of paper), answer the following...
- What do you like about the draft?
- What could the writer do to improve the draft?
- Answer the writer's question.
Rounds 3&4
Proofread for surface errors!!!!!
PROJECT WORK TIME
1. Mask Work
2. Essay Revision
3. Additional Critique??
